Today I finished day two of my new 5K 101 program to get me off the couch and doing something with my life. Well, I don’t spend a ton of time on the couch doing nothing, per say, but I’ve been feeling very discouraged lately. With respect to everyone who has encouraged me thus far in my musical aspirations, thank you; however, I need more motivation from within myself. A secret goal I have (that won’t be a secret anymore) is to run a marathon…but I’m not yet an athlete, so I needed to begin somewhere. My hope is this motivation will translate into other life pursuits.
My first day of running, I went down to a popular trail situated next to a small creek. It’s a bit hilly, but rarely curves or has places hidden from view. That day, the run was not too difficult. I saw others exercising and I found encouragement sharing in…their pain. Haha 🙂 Today, on the other hand, I decided to run in my own neighborhood. No one else was around and I had to choose which street I would turn down, which sometimes interrupted my flow. The run wasn’t more difficult (I was doing the same thing I had before), but the environment made it a bit more challenging to finish.
A few years back, when I first wrote this crazy marathon idea on my bucket list, I’d been meditating on Philippians 3:12-14. I thought, what does it look like to press on toward a goal even when one doesn’t feel like it? How can I learn this skill? I had to come to terms with myself, and am still trying to embrace the reality, that I like to give up before I see any results. Distractions dissuade me from caring enough to press on.
When I run the straight path, I can see what’s ahead. I’m learning that running is easier when I don’t look at my feet. When I look forward, whether or not I can see the finish, per say, I’m much more relaxed and able to move forward. When I surround myself with others who are chasing after goals, I’m encouraged to finish. However, if I run a path of uncertainty, I lose sight of the goal. I try and make up my own way which only makes the challenge more difficult. Yes, I may end up where I intended to go, but I’ve done it on my own.
You know, God has a path set for each of us. For lack of a better, less Christianese term, the straight and narrow may look less exciting, but by taking that path, I know I will get to where I need to be. Running in my neighborhood, I came in contact with a lot more cars, a lot more blind spots. The creek path, however, was a pedestrian, cycling path. It doesn’t mean challenges won’t present themselves on that path, it just means we are more apt to get where we’re going with the protection of the rules of that road.
I definitely have not come to truly embrace and understand all that God spoke to me through this experience thus far. I’m not perfect, and I’m still running on the uncertain road. However, I have to get to the point where I keep pressing on, forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead. It’s daily submission, daily repentance, and a big giant heart change. It’s wanting Him more than my own life…my own will…my own desires…my own way. It’s killing my flesh daily. And most days, I don’t want to. It’s the tug-of-war between temporary life and eternal love.
One mile at a time, one day at a time: I still have much to learn.